A few years ago I was a member of the Carmichael Training Systems Forums and we put together this list from the members. Quite a few of them are mine and the rest, well they are not! ;) 

Enjoy:

You look down in the shower and you can't see your kneecaps because your quads are too big.

you're more concerned with the state of you shiny new bike after a crash than with yourself...

when you have a different bike for every occasion.... mtb, winter training bike (mudguards), summer training bike, road bike, bike to go to shops on(i do not care if it gets stolen), bike set up on turbo trainer.... 

My wife thinks I only need 1 bike..... she just doesn't understand   

When you start driving on the interstate with the same tactics and aggression you use in criteriums.

Coach Renee

Renee, I'll second that one! I drive that way all the time  

LOL! I'm going to yell "INSIDE!!" next time I pass some guy on the right . . .

(Rich, why is it that there's one -- and only one -- of those guys in every crit?)

-) You see a rotating pattern in freeway traffic during your commute. AND...take full advantage of it to try and set a "personal course record" on the way to work. 

 

-) You consciously fight the desire to drop the guy who made an effort to catch and pass you while you spending some quality time riding recovery miles. Cmon..you know...the guy you can hear shifting like crazy while coming up behind you and then he holds his breath as he rides by...hehehe

 

-) When you wake up late and have to call the office you apologize for being "off the back." Worse yet are the funny looks you get when you arrive at the office. Even worse than that is the fact that you may have made it on time but you just "had to shave the legs first."

You know you're a cyclist when you're sitting in a 10 a.m. meeting with 20 people - 19 of whom are drinking coffee from little paper cups and eating donuts, and you're sipping water from a 3-year-old bright purple water bottle eating a Clif Bar looking at your watch determining whether or not you can fit in that 60 minute endurance ride with 2 sets of 3 FP intervals before your 2 p.m. meeting....

Everything you own has cycling-related stickers on it! Absolutely everything...even the bright purple water bottle and your insulated coffee mug

...and you will always think that it's cool to be a "Cutter"...you'd own the t-shirt if you could.

Here is a funny email from awhile back....

You Know You're Addicted to Cycling When:

Your surgeon tells you need a heart valve replacement

and you ask if you have a choice between presta and schrader.

A measurement of 44-36-40 doesn't refer to the latest

Playboy centerfold, but that new gear ratio you were considering for

your Cobra.

A Power Bar starts tasting better than a Snickers.

The bra your significant other finds in your glove

compartment belongs to your Trek and not the cute waitress at Denny's.

You wear your heart monitor to bed to make sure you stay

within your target zone during any extracurricular activities.

The funeral director tells you "NO!" you can't ride your

Cannondale in the funeral procession, even if you keep your headlight

on.

You experience an unreasonable envy over someone who has

bar end extenders longer than yours.

You're too tired for hanky-panky on a Friday night but

pump out a five-hour century on Saturday.

Your wife tells you the only way she'll let you ride

across the country is over her dead body and you tell her, "If that's

the case, you'll be my first speed bump!"

You no longer require a hankie to blow your nose.

You have stopped even trying to explain to your spouse

why you need two bikes...you just go buy another one and figure it will

all work out in the divorce settlement.

You buy your crutches instead of renting.

You convert your car's brake and gas pedals to clipless.

You see nothing wrong with discussing the connection

between hydration and urine color.

You find your Shimano touring shoes to be more

comfortable and stylish than your gunboat sneakers.

You refuse to buy a couch because that patch of

wallspace is taken up by the bike.

You have more money invested in your bike clothes than

in the rest of your combined wardrobe.

Biker chick means black spandex, not leather, and a

Marinoni, not a Harley.

"Four cheeseburgers and four large French Fries" is for

you.

You see a fit, tanned, Lycra-clad young woman ride by,

and the first thing you check out is her bicycle.

You empathize with the roadkill.

Despite all that winter fat you put on, you'll skim

weight by buying titanium components.

You use wax on your chain, but not on your car.

Your mud guards are made out of milk jugs.

Your first course when you eat out is a large banana

split.

When driving, you yell "On Your Left!" on passing

another car.

You yell "Hole!" when you see a pothole while driving

your car.

Your bike has more miles on its computer then your car's

odometer.

You wear your riding gloves when driving your car.

You wear your bike shorts swimming.

You wear Charles River Wheelmen T-shirts all the time,

including under dress shirts.

Your bikes are worth more than your car.

You buy a mini-van and immediately remove the rear seats

to allow your bikes to fit.

When you move to a new area the first thing you look for

is a bike shop.

You have more bike jerseys than dress shirts.

You take your bike along when you shop for a car - just

to make sure the bike will fit inside.

You use the Yakima or Thule 'Fit Catalog' to pick your

next new car instead of Consumer Reports.

You start yelling at cars to "hold your line."

You're comfortable bumping elbows with step vans.

You view crashes as an opportunity to upgrade

components.

You clean your bike(s) more often then your car.

You're on the Board of Directors for a Bike Club.

You spend weeks during the summer spraying arrows on the

sides of roads.

You and your significant other have and wear identical

riding clothes.

You mount a $600 cap, on a $1,000 pickup truck, so your

$3,000 bike doesn't get wet.

You can't seem to get to work by 8:30 AM, even for

important meetings, but you don't have any problems at all meeting your

buddies at 5:30 AM for a hammerfest.

You can tell your spouse, with a straight face, that

it's too hot to mow the lawn and then bike off for a century.

You regard inter-gender discussion of genital pain as normal.

You know your cadence, but you have no idea what your

speed is.

When driving your car you lean over the steering wheel,

just like an aerobar.

Your car sits outside your garage because your garage is

full of bikes and cycling gear.

You tailgate a semi-trailer to get the drafting effect.

The Bike Nashbar customer order number is on your speed

dial.

You hear someone had a crash and your first question is

"How's the bike?"

You smile at your evening date, and she politely points

out that you seem to have bugs in your teeth.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other

friends who are addicted to cycling.

And I will add to it:

You think "I have to shave my legs before I pick her up tonight for dinner"

I'm cracking up about the matching gear with your significant other...

Your almost 3 year old has two treks and a schwinn and you play cyclocross in the basement, complete with barriers

Your boyfriend's legs are smoother than yours are...

I gues that should be, "your legs are smoother than your girlfriend's!"

One criteria I have for dating a woman is she can't be turned off by smooth legs

One criterion I have for dating ... she can recognize that the "additional" picture in my profile on Match.com is Lance Armstrong and not me. Duh!

Now, where are all those dates I was hoping for? Must be those smooth legs...

Smearing a bunch of cold goo on your "undercarriage" seems like a good idea.

 

These are all just so hilarious...which indicates they are true. Marc

...you finally find a girlfriend who understands your innate desire to stare at another's legs. And the "other's" legs are of the same sex as yours. And she understands.

You know you're a female cyclist when the big news on your group email is that the pros are out here training and Ekimov's butt is smaller than you'd think....

...or...You enjoy getting your wife back with "sandpaper legs" in the middle of the night. After all, turnabout is fair play ;->

You have to buy jeans a size or two to big in the waste so your thighs can fit w/comfort

you got it! i have to buy jeans two sizes too big to fit my thighs. my personal training clients say "i want legs like yours" i tell them they will have to buy larger clothes--they just laugh.

I liked that one ... "You empathize with the roadkill." [personal story]

Wish I had that problem with the oversized quads [another personal story]

You guys got me laughing. You know you're hooked when you spend way too much time on this forum!

My favorite:

You're comfortable bumping elbows with step vans.

I am more comfortable riding in traffic (cars) then riding elbow to elbow with other riders  

You use a better quality razor on your legs than you do on your face.

You move the 5 disc DVD player down from the living room to hook up to the tv in front of your trainer and replace it with the cheapest single disc units you can find.

A pain shoots down your spine when the guy in the next cubicle says that he spent $50 on two new bikes for his kids over the weekend. Wal-Mart had a sale.

You remodel a closet specifically for your cycling gear.

You invest 12 hours of research time for a set of new wheels and only 3 hours into a new deck.

You know you're a cyclist when...the following gets a few LOL's out of you...(also from an earlier post):

Cyclists are the biggest sandbaggers and secret trainers around.

They'll say anything to soften you up for the kill. Don't let this happen to you. Study this handy rider's phrasebook to find out what they really mean when they say:

"I'm out of shape"

Translation: I ride 400 miles a week and haven't missed a day since the Ford administration. I replace my 11-tooth cog more often than you wash your shorts. My body fat percentage is lower than your mortgage rate.

"I'm not into competition. I'm just riding to stay in shape" ---

Translation: I will attack until you collapse in the gutter, babbling and whimpering. I will win the line sprint if I have to force you into oncoming traffic. I will crest this hill first if I have to grab your seat post, and spray energy drink in your eyes.

"I'm on my beater bike"

Translation: I had this baby custom-made in Tuscany using titanium blessed by the Pope. I took it to a wind tunnel and it disappeared. It weighs less than a fart and costs more than divorce.

"It's not that hilly"

Translation: This climb lasts longer than a presidential campaign. Be careful on the steep sections or you'll fall over -- backward. You have a

39x23 low gear? Here's the name of my knee surgeon.

"You're doing great, honey"

Translation: Yo, lard ass, I'd like to get home before midnight. This is what you get for spending the winter decorating and eating chocolate. I shoulda married that cute Cat 1 racer when I had the chance.

"This is a no-drop ride"

Translation: I'll need an article of your clothing for the search-and-rescue dogs.

"It's not that far"

Translation: Bring your passport

"It's not that hilly"

Translation: This climb lasts longer than a presidential campaign. Be careful on the steep sections or you'll fall over -- backward. You have a

39x23 low gear? Here's the name of my knee surgeon

- I like this one especially!  

More cyclist code phrases:

I bonked

(All I took for a 4-hour hammerfest was a half-empty bottle of month-old OJ and a moldy Twinkie)

If you don't crash, you're not going fast enough, dude!

(I crash a lot)

I don't own a car, dude!

(I'm a better person than you)

Why doesn't somebody do something about all these potholes?

(Why doesn't somebody else do something about all these potholes?)

I do all my own bike maintenance

(When I squeeze the front brake lever, the bike shifts gears)

Thanks for waiting

(Wipe that smug grin off your ugly face)

Hey, did you guys hear about those new 1.8 gram carbon-fiber quick-release skewers with titanium springs?

(I am a very lonely person)

This has sort of been said: "Your bikes (plural) are worth way more than you car."

You pass the dirt bikes on a good decent.

You look at you legs and name the crash that goes scar.

You look at your legs and there are so many scars you lost count of the previous statement a long time ago.

After hammering along with others in the group ride, you recall that you scheduled EM workout specified that HR > 160, and that you were mistaken to think that the plan was HR < 160.

...You've asked your kids if they have cleaned their room "As Prescribed"!

You refer to your coffee break as a "CI" interval

...the words "carbon fiber" arouse more than your interest

. . .you spend your kids' inheritance in your head every time the new Excel Sports, Colorado Cyclist, or (insert name of other high end catalog here) arrives in the mail.

. . .dudes with hairy legs just look strange to you.

. . .people at work make a comment like, "Is Lance going to win the Tour this year?" and you go into a 45 minute analysis of all of the contenders, the course, technology advances since last year, doping, Sheryl Crow, race strategy, and then realize the person that asked you was just making small talk and walked away 44 minutes and 58 seconds ago.

. . .you start trying to find ways to decorate around the house using 500,000,000 inner tubes that have holes in them that you kept because you were going to patch them and reuse them "someday".

You watch "A Sunday in Hell" and wish you were there!

You look at somebody wearing the "Discovery" kit and chuckle to yourself.

Your desktop background is a picture of a carbon bicycle.

You watch "A Hard Road" and wish you were there.

You watch the Tour De France and don't wish you were there!

You come to the realization that "Mapei" are flooring and construction products for the rest of the world (that was me!)

You spend $400 upgrading components on your old bike, turn around and buy a new bike for $2000, then put your old bike up on eBay hoping to get $400 - all the while convinced the upgrades were justified.

You see a long climb as a great an opportunity to set a new PR on your max HR.

When you strap your road ID around your ankle only to realize your wearing a suit and will be driving to work

What's a 'job?'

A job is something you do to pay for your "habit".

You know you are a cyclist when you buy Ben & Jerry's based on the HIGHEST calorie count!

Related to the ice cream, from when I use to grow 2 to 3 inches per year and swim 4+ hrs a day during the peak months (14,000 to 18,000 yards/meters - all intervals all the time, 6 days per week, Sundays and swim meets were all the recovery I'd get). So this is 20+ years old:

I used to go into dunkin donuts and order a dozen donuts. They'd start giving me odd looks from behind the counter when I'd start to eat the sixth or seventh donut.

I used to go Target to buy the sheet birthday cakes (yes, target used to sell birthday cakes). The large sheet birthday cakes. And I'd eat the whole thing in several days, maybe sharing with some friends who were also in huge calorie deficit.

How about this, you know you are an old school cyclist when "energy drink" was spelled T.E.A. or alternatively, "de-carbonated COCA COLA." Limit: two per ride, or if you couldn't afford the extra bottle holder, one per ride. (Because that's what Jacques Anquetil was "on.")

You know you are a modern-day cyclist when you a drink a smoothie within 45 minutes or less of completing your workout and that smoothie contains at least:

* 65 g isolated soy protein (lysine : arginine ratio 0.67 + BCAA complex)

* 10-15 g soluble fiber (e.g., oatbran, psyllium husk, apples, pears)

* 1 container of anti-oxidants ( e.g., blueberries, blackberries, cranberries)

* Topped up to the brim with fat-free frozen yogurt

You know you are a cyclist when your friends name is "Coach"

You're out walking with your wife on a trail and when somebody comes towards you on a bike you say, "rider up".

You're shopping for a collar for your dog at Petco and you ask for the "lightest" one!

When your 'rest day' is on a national holiday, you say to yourself, 'OK, I'll cut back my ride and only go for 60 miles and 6,000 of elevation gain'. Then when on the ride, you remember your college t-shirt that says "You can catch up on your sleep when you're dead", the endorphins addle your brain, and you complete the ride in 3 hours.

Of course, you do this because you believe that you are out of shape:

"I'm out of shape"

Translation: I ride 400 miles a week and haven't missed a day since the Ford administration. I replace my 11-tooth cog more often than you wash your shorts. My body fat percentage is lower than your mortgage rate.

. . .you got your spouse a kinky new bondage get up for Valentine's Day that consists of old arm and leg warmers, black PI socks, and an HRM chest belt!

You know you are a cyclist when you refer to tropical storm as "a little rain" and go ride anyway.

When you and your SO have a serious discussion about the best way to remove the hair on your legs.

You know you are a cyclist when you're driving along and in the distance you see freshly asphalted road going up a long steep hill and a smile comes across your face.

In response to the fine-paved-rode-in-the-distance...

If you are ever on Hwy 395 on the way to Mammoth, look left just as you enter Lone Pine. You will see a monster zigzag up the mountain! There is an absolutely pristine road that goes from Whitney Portal Road in town to Horseshoe Meadow at 10,000 feet. It is awesome. We stayed there before doing Whitney.

Every time we drive by I swear I will ride it! I just need to bring the bike with me.

You know you are a cyclist when you think of a 5 hour EM ride as fun! (88.1 sunny miles today!)

You know you are a cyclist when you see the weather forecast for your race this weekend and it is going to be very wet and you think "hmm, I know I have trained in the cold wet rain before, have these guys?"

You know you are a cyclist when you understand when your buddy blows off the Tour of California to build up his new frameset.

Your wife glares at you when HBO (check local times and listings) is running "Breaking Away" every 3 hours and even though you are only "passing by the channel while surfing for something to watch" you can quote the film during ANY scene. 

Go Cutters!

Your pregnant wife, in Active Labor, let's you stop at the LBS while on the way to the hospital, so that you can buy the new issue of VeloNews. . . 

BTW - She came in the shop to look at pedals while having contractions.

....when you can appreciate what a lucky guy Bob (above) is to have a wife like that!  

Congratulations Bob... on all counts!

Your little one is going to have a titanium tricycle  

You know you're a cyclist when you and your bike have enough magnets, transmitters, and computers to require an FCC license to ride in public.

...you keep reading this 5 page thread to make sure you are not missing some argument you can share with your friends as to why you are in fact not weird.

....you keep posting to this thread even though all the good reasons were used up 3 pages ago.  

I don't know about all the good reasons being used up...the stop at the LBS during labor is epic...your wife rules dude!

Damn I've read so many I forgot about that one.  The wife in labor definitely was one of the better ones. I don't think my wife would have let me stop for anything during labor!

Okay...then maybe a better answer would have been:

...you can actually still think of reasons when there are 5 pages of response already

When you have only been riding for ten months, you decide you want to race.

On your first race (today) you come in third to last....and you cannot wait to race again.

Dang if I'll let that happen again!

You know you are a cyclist when you give up a 4 hour EM ride to spend Sunday with your "New" Girlfriend running around Disneyland and you start thinking that if we walk really fast from ride to ride I can log that as "Fast Pedals" and the wait in line as "Recovery"  

When you cancel Dish Network because they quit carrying OLN and Bob Roll!

You know you are a cyclist when you call in sick to work two days in a row with a sore throat and headache and you find yourself rationalizing getting on your bike as "therapeutic" and not a bad idea.

I had quite a few days last summer when I really felt fatigued from treatment. Sometimes I would just push through the workday but on other days I would contemplate leaving early and going home. As I'm thinking through the decision I start brainstorming about the group rides I could go to. I walk out the door and say something like, "Hey boss, feeling pretty beat, see you tomorrow". Only problem is that the next morning I can't brag about what a fun time I had out on the ride!

... ya can't wait for the next addition to the thread of "You know you're a cyclist when..." 

Keep 'em comin'!  

On a rainy day, you think ..

you check the weather radar on the internet and think to yourself, red is good

as you kit up, you leave your rain jacket behind because you'd rather be soaked to the bone than wear a sail and get blown all over the road (also, part of you refuses to dress like some weekend warrior that is 'braving the elements' - what a poser!)

you think about putting two-way adhesive strips on you sattle, knowing otherwise, during big climbs it will become so slickery (that's a technical term)

road grime on water bottles, yummy

road spray from the bike in front, yummy

vapor clouds of 1000% humidity: breath deep, yummy

another cloud-burst and wicked cross-winds, yummy

the rain and fog on the sunglasses makes the ride so psychedelic, cooooool duuude

the sounds of slick tires on wet roads is inspirational

lightening won't bother me because I'm a lean, mean, carbon-riding machine

auntie em had it right, but what's with the silly dog, carrying it for the ride must really damage her w/kg

too bad it's not snowing, then I'd have the roads to myself

unlike typical weekend days in spring, you grudgingly respect other cyclists on the road and don't aggressively chase them down like wolf after prey

post ride, the following instuctions might be inadequate: lather, rinse, repeat

And then even though it is rainy like crazy and you do respect that cyclist up the road, you just have to chase them down

You know you are a cyclist when the woman you were dating for the last month breaks up with you before the weekend you had planned together and the first thing that goes through your mind is "Sweet I can do that 5 hour ride on Sunday!"    

You know you are a cyclist when...

you can stand in front of the ice cream case at Vons and not think "I really shouldn't" but rather think "Hmm, which one of these has the most carbs?"

Out in a place where cars are scared to go, you're huffing though the first day of 90+ temps, some narly, high-grade climb, and a mean, blistering dustying side-wind which together make a small part of you cry for you mother and another part wonder exactly how far you are from cell-phone range, and instead of complaining, you woop out loud and then announce to no-one in particular (well because there ain't people where you are) "at least I'm not on my ******* trainer!"

And then you grin and think "endorphins are awesome!"

...you spend hours on the IRS website to see if you can find any tax deductions for your cycling gear that won't get you audited

You know you are cyclist when even though you are a man you look at your legs before going out in public wearing shorts and thinking "I should probably shave my legs first"

Someone at work asks you how you bumped your head. You look at them puzzled before realizing they are staring at the funny oval tan spots on yor forehead from your helmet  

 

You think they're cool...they don't. That's the difference  

You know you are a cyclist when...you are driving to work and you see pothole ahead and you automatically shout "hole!"

You know you are a cyclist when in spite of an almost unbearable itching on the lower part of your legs do to a 'mystery rash' of yet indeterminate origin you pre-ride the course for your race next week!

You know you are a cyclist when you get bummed that you can't shave your legs for two weeks and have to ride without 'the smooth' (allergic reaction, told not to shave by doctor until it clears)

You know you are a cyclist when...you spend the morning watching the screen refresh on the VeloNews Giro Live update page and get just as excited as if you were watching it on TV.

You know your a cyclist when .. you start a blog to give blow by blow descriptions of training, not racing, but training. http://dudegoeswhat.blogspot.com

You know you are a cyclist when you maintain a separate credit card so that your wife doesn't see your PerformanceBike.Com orders and the UPS lady knows to hide your packages

You've just had a hemorrhoid removed and are debating doing that 2 1/2 hr loop ride

You 1.) wake up at 4am on a 40-degree, rainy, Saturday morning, 2.) drive 3 hours to a training location that has some real hills, 3.) train for 6 hours in the cold and rain, 4.) drive 3 hours home, and 5.) love every minute of the process and look forward to doing it again next weekend  

You know you are a cyclist when you see coverage of the Giro and they are riding in freezing rain and steep hills and you think "I would give anything to be doing THAT right now instead of working"

You ride with the cat 1 guys on a Thursday AM group ride and get dropped after 4 miles and can't wait for the next Thursday's ride

You forward the list from the first page to your girlfriend and she has actually observed you doing the majority of them!

You know you are a cyclist when you see a homeless guy with a sign that says 'will work for food' and you would have written "will chase down breaks for food" or "will provide lead out for sprinters for Fat Tire Amber Ale

You scour the World Wide Web for live coverage of any major race in Europe and find yourself hitting the 'refresh' key continuously and getting excited READING the finishing 1k of a race.

* You use your helmet as a hair-styling device.

* You think nothing of walking into public places dressed in tights like a super hero.

* You can give instantaneous directions to any corner in the city, but only for those using bike paths and public transportation.

* Multi-ton cars and trucks are tearing along in front, alongside and coming up behind you... your pulse rate: 66.

* All of your pants have frayed cuffs and chain-grease marks.

* You keep deodorant and baby wipes at the office.

* You are polite to most everyone, you blush at some rap songs, but you swear like a drunken sailor when a grandma in an SUV cuts you off.

* You've been asked if you're a tap dancer.

* Although you speak only English, you're perfectly capable of pronouncing several words in Italian.

* The friend who was so happy to see you on his morning drive wonders why you gave him the finger when he honked.

* When someone asks for advice on buying a bike, you either:

a) ask, "How many thousands do you want to spend?"

b) assail them with so many questions about intended use, riding style and the like, not to mention such personal questions as pubic bone height, that you make buying a bicycle sound like rocket science and unintentionally put them off the idea.

* When that same person reacts by saying, "It's only a bicycle," your jaw drops and your eyes bug out, and you're only half kidding.

* When you encounter rough pavement, you say to yourself, "Ah, pave," and daydream about leaving the peloton in your dust as you speed through Arenberg Forest.

* A car goes by with two (your preferred gender here) carrying two bikes. Later, you can't recall their hair color or what make car, but you can ID the bikes' make, model and color.

* You have 3 bikes and you absolutely need more.

* You sometimes wish you had a longer commute to work, just so you could ride more.

* You ride 50 miles, one way, with a twenty in your pocket and if you actually buy something, you consider leaving the change because of the weight.

* You select a restaurant because of its charming, outdoor dining. Your bike is 23 inches away. You lock it anyway. But you can't enjoy your meal because you can't take your eyes off your bike.

* You consider the color of the bikes hanging from your ceiling when selecting home decor.

* You missed more than two family events this summer due to scheduling conflicts with club rides.

* You and your friends can recreate the "Jaws" scene where Quint, Brody, and Hooper compare scars, each with an even better story behind it, except yours go something like "This is from a 1990 Buick station wagon that turned left in front of me and put me over the hood."

* Another cyclist asks you for the location of the nearest bike shop; you fix their bike on the spot.

* You shop for your spring wardrobe at our store, rather than malls and clothing stores.

* Your idea of surfing consists of drafting buses, minivans, and SUVs to keep up with the green wave.

* You practice track stands and bunny hops in your spare time.

* When actually driving, you stop at a red light and since no pedestrians are in the crosswalk you start to drive right through before you realize you are NOT on a bike, and slam on the brakes.

* Similarly, when driving on the highway at 60 mph, you freak out at a 1-inch-wide groove in the pavement. What if your tires get stuck?

* You know the location of all the major potholes between your home and office.

* You can't think of the last time you saw any of your friends who don't bike

"* When you encounter rough pavement, you say to yourself, "Ah, pave," and daydream about leaving the peloton in your dust as you speed through Arenberg Forest."

You know you are a cyclist when the number of jersey's hanging on the shower rod out number the bras.

You think nothing of getting up a 330am to watch the TDF live for 3 weeks but would never get up that early for any other reason with the exception of driving to a race.

Oh man, that's exactly what I was thinking this morning as I was dragging my lazy ass out of bed in the dark to watch the Tour...

Bobke really turns you on.

Your seven year old daughter toddles into the living room where you are installed on the trainer watching the morning's stage and says, "Mom, can I have a Clif bar in the feed zone?"

...you refer to your children as "your little domestiques."

or 

1. You place your child on a bike on the way in from the hospital

2. when you have twins and you are trying to figure which one is going to be a climber and which one is going to be a sprinter

3. And if you wonder if they will allow my daugher to ride in the Tour in 2028

You know you are a cyclist when you do an 11 mile 11% climb and want to go back and do it again...but faster  

You know you're a cyclist when you can explain the transformation of a 'snot rocket' to a 'kite'.

You know you are a cyclist when your 9 year old daughter is coming to visit and you are trying to figure out how to record a day at Disneyland in your training log  

Do you think security would question the HR monitor strap! Lol

...Mt. Washington sounds interesting.

When you a Jaguar with a Madone on the back of it. And you stare at the bike not the car.

You keep trying to recruit friends and strangers to C.T.S. and your local cycling club   

You know you are a cyclist when you ride no matter how cold or how warm the Winter weather is in your area. Easy for me since it's usually warm after 10am.

 

You know you are a cyclist when you ride no matter how cold or how warm the Winter weather is in your area. Easy for me since it's usually warm after 10am."

I was thinking the same thing this morning when I left for my ride... 34.8 deg,  I must be nuts...

 

You know you are a cyclist when every so often you have to dig up this thread :)

btw... where is dude.abides anyway?

-Scotteeg